the PathFinder



The Sun was red and the glow was spreading slowly all around. After covering so much of the distance, the sunlight reached to me through a translucent glass window of my room. I was sleeping on my bed and set off the alarm a few minutes before. It was Friday, six in the morning.

Occasionally I used to have a morning walk, but that day was little slothy. So, I got over from my bed at 7. As usual and as everyone does, I had also completed all the basic formalities of freshness, after all, I was a student. While cleaning my tooth, I was standing in front of the mirror and crooning a rap song and trying to be like a charming hunk. When it was all over, I came back to my room and mopped my hands and face looked at my phone which had six missed calls.

Curiously, I unlocked my phone and was trying to locate the missed caller. I came to know that, he was my friend. I had tried to call him, but he did not receive, sarcastically, I thought, he has also gone to complete the formalities of freshness. So, I decided to call him in a while.

After having breakfast, I called him thrice, but again, he did not pick up my call. Seriously, I was full of anger and abused him like hell. And I was asking myself “what the hell is going with him, why he did not receive my phone call”. Offensively, I had decided to go to his place and would hit him hard.

Now, I think you should know a little about him. He and I were the best friends by the 3rd standard. We used to eat together, laugh together, tease someone together, fight together and much more. He was one of the decent, brilliant and charming students of our class. I really appreciate him for this, but what I didn’t like about him was, he has a very polite and sweet demeanour. For me, he was like a badass criminal, but for others, he was like a puppet. I used to tell him that one day you’ll regret off due to your excess decency.



We did our intermediate together and got separated for our further studies, not by choice but by chance because I was not as meritorious as him. He had taken admission in one of the reputed colleges of India and started pursuing his engineering degree. As both of us were engaged in our studies and most importantly, the distance between us become a reason why we did not have a frequent conversation. We were unable to meet even on vacations for two years.

One day, on his birthday, I called him to greet him and inquired him about his life. On that day, it seemed like I had a conversation with my 3rd standard old friend and wanted to live that life once again. That day, he and I were not going to put our phone down. I really loved that moment and expected from God, not to end it. After 2 hours of nonstop negotiation, my phone’s battery was down. And again, not by choice but by chance, we had to conclude our conversation. But in the end, he told me that “I am coming this Thursday night, meet me on Friday”.

I aggressively approached to rendezvous him on my Huskee. Huskee is my motorcycle which he liked the most to have a long drive. Within 10 minutes, I had reached the society. I was pulling into his room autonomously. I was so excited because I was going to meet my old friend and I was going to hit him hard because he didn’t pick up my calls. I was heading toward his room number 245. I was stepping closer to the door and memorizing our childhood moment, which I wanted to live together again. Finally, I stood in front of the door, I calmed down and knocked.

Unfortunately, he did not open the door, causing me to knock again and again. After knocking the door several times and getting no response from him, it intimidated me. Therefore, I decided to break the door and enter the room.



As I entered the room, I was numb, devastated and broke because he hung himself from the ceiling and wrote on the wall “Sorry! I quit”. Somehow, I regained myself to the current situation and tried to remove him from the roof. I was mentally sick and I had no idea what to do to save his life. I called some neighbours for help and begged him to save his life. I was sobbing and shivering from top to bottom, grasping him in my arms and trying to talk with him. But that bastard did not answer again.

A few minutes later, an ambulance arrived and I took him to the hospital, where the doctor stamped on his death certificate. I could not accept it at all. I went to his room and asked him to awaken, abused him so that he would get up and abuse me back with the same intensity. But that didn’t happen. He has left me, left his family and left this mean world forever.

He has written only three words, but those three words were ringing badly and seeking someone’s help. And that someone was me because he called me six times before he hung himself. Maybe he wanted to share his deepest thought of life with me. But I was doing shit in front of the mirror waiting for his suicide. Maybe he needed a Path Finder for his life. But I could not understand his mental pressure.

Be a man or woman or transgender, there comes a time in everyone’s life when they need support to boost their willpower and overcome obstacles. It does not matter what kind of bonding you have, what level of understanding you have. But all that matters, they only need a shoulder on which they can lay their head, whom they can talk to, who listens to them carefully and try to establish an emotional connection with them.

According to the World Health Organization 2018 report, India ranks 21st based on the highest suicide rate in the world. 18 out of every 100000 men commit suicide. And 15 out of every 100000 women lost their lives due to suicide. In 2018, 220481 total suicide case reported in India was. These numbers are very large because many cases have not yet been registered.

Surely, killing yourself requires a lot of courage, no doubt, but reconsider it once more, it is a sign of useless courage because when you leave this world, everyone forgets about you within a month.  Suicide case has increased rapidly in India for the last two decades. And most preferred age group for doing this is 15-39 years.

Now, what are the reasons for increasing suicide rates in India:

·       Westernisation: adapting modernisation:

We must adapt modernisation for our goodwill, but on the other hand, we must reject the worst part of westernisation. There are many gifts given to us in the sake of westernisation, one of the gifts is Suicide. Let me remind you all Italy was the first place where the first suicide case was registered. India is an agricultural country “India was an agricultural country” isn’t it?

A survey held in 2004-05, which emphasise that India is no more an agrarian economy because there is decrement of 1.87% in the agricultural sector and a huge increment of 8% in non-farm economy.

Yes, it was, but now India is more or less, turning to be like the western economy, which seems like an illusion due to poor politics, meaningless debates organised by the fourth pillar of democracy, the pathetic education system and reliability on other countries for basic facilities. Due to the acceptance of modernisation, it uniformly degrades agricultural farming in India and it directly affects the farmers and eventually leads to farmers’ suicide.

No doubt, modernisation enables to increase the economic growth. Under the influence of westernisation sanitation and public health has improved so far. But still, India should take care of this globalization because, in the future, it will change India and destroy its religion, culture and tradition.

·      Cronyism and Nepotism:

    When a pure talent is trying to emerge and wants to fly high, all nepotist and cronyist are always cut their efforts and push them in an awful environment. They mainly belong to the so-called high profile and upper class of India who wants to secure the future of their favourites or their kith and kins.

·      Academic stress:


India is also a leading country on the basis of suicide attempt among students pursuing higher studies. Due to the psychological impact on students forcibly opting courses, heavy assignments and lack of professor’s support. This leads students to commit suicide.

 

·      Monophobia:


A feeling of being left out of the circle of friends or family increases the likelihood of suicide.

 

·      Lack of parental support:


Sometimes, students also need favourable support from their parents. But if they did not get it. It became the significant reason to attempt suicide just because of their parents, who had no emotional bonding with them and never told them “I am proud of you”.

 

·      Fear of losing:

In every game of life, someone has to win and another one has to lose but losing a game should not be a reason to attempt suicide. Instead, we should take it as a challenge and put our best to beat them in future.

Precisely, I would say, mental stress is the common cause in all of the above. Sometimes, if you take it as a challenge then It can help you but sometimes it becomes a reason to attempt suicide. If you have any kind of stress, put it out and share it with your loved one. Truly, you will feel better and more likely that you will get your answer from them. Don’t be a murderer of your own. Remember a line

अगर खोला होता दिल अपनो के साथ

तो खोलना नहीं परता दिल औजारों के साथ

These are some major points that led to suicide cases in India. I want to say to the youth of this country, I know everyone has problems and only they can find the solution how to come out of it. Be patient, don’t take any action which can’t be undone and remains like a deep wound to your loved one. Love yourself, Enjoy life and be an Achiever.

~Deepak